Comfort Creates Chaos

Have you ever noticed that comfort creates chaos?

Comfort slowly narrows your focus until immediate relief becomes more compelling than long-term purpose.

We rarely wake up one morning feeling completely disconnected from ourselves. Instead, it happens one comfortable decision at a time.

Here's the silent process:

You enjoy some comfort... then enjoy a little more.
That was easy. 

Then you procrastinate on something because that feels good too. Why not?
This is the point of departure from integrity.

As indulgence in comfort increases, so does forgetfulness. You lose track of the reason you wanted to stay disciplined in the first place. What goal did that align with again?

Before you know it, you’re settled comfortably in a routine of comfortable decisions. Scarier yet, excuses.
You say things like, "I should because this makes me feel better." Or, once your'e even deeper, "I need this because it makes me feel better.’

Now it’s become a captivating reliance on habits that don't match your intended direction.

A workout skipped.
An uncomfortable conversation avoided.
A promise broken.

None of these decisions feel all too significant or impactful in the moment.

Over time, they slowly change your direction.

You feel this separation, this gap, between yourself and your actions. Maybe you don't identify it. You feel it, but it’s intangible, even mostly subconscious. You try to put your finger on what's wrong, but can’t quite identify the beast that looms in the dark.

This is the space between yourself and your integrity.

You wonder why you feel this way.

Because you departed from what mattered, you find it very challenging to define what you want now.

Now, your desire for comfort overshadows your purpose. Setting immediacy aside for long-term planning and consistency is an uncomfortable, difficult inconvenience.

Comfort now has you trapped in chaos in your mind. You now aren't sure where to point your focus long-term, so you focus on the short term, where the only compelling thing is immediate fulfillment.

You forget what you wanted, and on some level, what makes you feel like you.

That, incidentally, is usually choosing what feels right over what feels easy.

How do you reverse this pattern?

One step at a time.

Every decision and action brings you back in line with your integrity. This is what starts feeling good––satisfaction of a different sort––and a little bit of momentum here moves mountains.

The more in line you are your true self, the more compelling the process becomes. Flexing your discipline to reclaim your power becomes increasingly more rewarding. It becomes easier to make good decisions and turn your back on everything that seduces you.

You will have hard moments. You’re swimming upstream by building good habits, and you will feel that sometimes.

But that’s okay.

It’s how you build character and prove your own strength to yourself over time. 

Don’t think of the hard moments as the end of the road, they are most definitely not.

You’re human.

Allow your process to be imperfect. It will still carry you to your destination.

It begins with one decision. One achievable habit. Then another.

All of these micro-actions create incredible momentum.

Instead of acting on emotions, allow them to be the passenger. Carry out the actions you know are right for you, regardless of how you feel about them.

You'll notice something that might surprise you. Those emotions will exist with you, then dissipate. The process is often far less painful than the mind expects it to be.

This is how you become emotionally adept.

Carry on without so much as a cruel word towards yourself. You may have fallen down three steps, but you’ve already climbed five. Take the next step after that. Consistency will beat imperfection every time.

Finally, you will find a handhold at the top of the mountain you just climbed and, in that moment, you realize you were never lost. You never departed completely from yourself. 

You were just one step away from self-compassion, support, and enough honesty to make the hard decisions because they were right, not the compelling ones because they were easy.

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If comfort has pulled you away from the person you want to be, continue building the discipline to come back to yourself with The Art of Being Human by Melissa Lynn Sharp.